The 3rd Silly Season Award Goes To…
(You knew it was coming, didn’t you?)
Susan Berland for holding a press conference called “Adopt A Hydrant”. We received an anonymous tip that this was coming, but we thought it was a joke and never followed up on it. Much to our surprise, The Huntingtonian was not invited to the press conference or given the press release.
Disclaimer: Before we get into the many reasons why this qualifies for a silly season award, we want to state that we believe it is extremely important that we all do our part to keep the fire hydrants clear of debris and snow.
Although we have many reasons why this qualifies for a Silly Season Award, we have narrowed it down to our top 10, (Your list may be different).
10. If Susan really wanted this program to be effective, she should have asked the local Fire Departments to promote it. Huntingtonians love their volunteer Fire Departments.
9. Susan was completely clueless about how this would be perceived by the public and how her adversaries would use this. That’s what happenes when you are in control of most media sources for too long.
8. This is one more example of how Susan loves to see her face in print. She would be at the opening of an envelope if there was a microphone and camera there.
7. If Susan participates in the program, do we have to pay for Susan’s mileage to get back and forth from the fire hydrant?
6. The press release states “Residents who “adopt a hydrant” are required to keep it clear of any debris, litter, foliage or snow that may hinder the ability of an emergency responder to access it.” Required? What happens to those who sign up and don’t fullfill the requirement?
5. We have a school closed, polluted waters, empty food pantries, crime, code-enforcement issues, etc. This should not have made the list of Susan’s priorities.
4. This is clearly another one of the many projects sponsored by Susan that will never get followed up on.
3. If the fire hydrant is located in front of a single family home that has 8 families in it, how do we prioritize which family will be allowed to adopt the hydrant?
2. We presume Susan will allow dogs to adopt the hydrant only if the hydrant is located in Huntington Station?
1. A man was killed last week, after being shot at multiple times in various locations throughout the Town, there was no press conference held, not even so much as a statement issued.
…and just when you think it can’t get more silly…, we checked out the “Adopt-A-Hydrant” link set up by the Town and discovered that many of the fire hydrants listed do not exist or do not have the correct address. (Which is a whole different issue that needs to be addressed). Why bother to check the effectiveness of the program when you need to get your photo op in before election day.
Unfortunately, in the Town of Huntington, the comedy writes itself. Except when you think about the state of our Town, it’s really not that funny. Since we would rather laugh than cry, we will continue to look for humor in our situation.